ER trips + dealing with disappointment // THE STORY

I need to upload so many pictures that I think Imma gonna go crazy.



Ok, so I'm not sure exactly where to start. Things have been crazy.

Our house is crazy. A wreck is what it is.
Our kitchen is upside down. Remodeling.
School needing done.
All the craziness any one could imagine-yet more.
Trips to the doctor, and constant errands.
Being so disappointed I could cry.
Blood sugar testing after meals and every morning.
Worried expressions.

trying to just. breathe.

But God is still here, giving me those moments where we are happy and everything is fine and I can here His whisper, 'I am holding you. I've got this. Trust Me.'

June 1st {{the perfect way to start the month..not}}

I woke up at 5:00 in the most pain I've ever felt. I didn't know then how much worry that would later lead to.  I woke Mom up and by 6:30 we were at the ER. I threw up twice, but the pain wasn't a sick kind of feeling. The pain was what made me get sick. [anyways..]  They got me in really quick and gave me Ibuprofen and Zofran, and we were assured it wasn't appendicitis praise the Lord. But the Dr. found my blood sugar high, so he said we would need to follow up on that.   They did an ultra sound, and we later found out that the pain was a cyst. Thankfully it should go away without much trouble tho.
We got a bs testing kit and I pricked myself every morning. I was high. High enought to indicate type 1 diabetes.  (Of course we had no clue what else could play a role in high blood sugar yet..) That morning there was a LOT of crying. Lots of praying. My whole life felt different from that reading saying I had diabetes.  I continued pricking myself when I should and it was still high, yet funky. Once it got too low and I almost passed out. I chugged some pop and ate some white bread trying to get it up again. Things were just crazy!
A few days later we went to the Dr. and my blood sugar is completely normal as to my knowledge. We are still waiting on the result to get back from the lab. I've been fine since then, and they say that it was probably just high because of the pain I was in. (Hbs can be caused by allergies, illness, hormones, etc.) They HIGHLY don't think I have type one, which I am SO happy!!!!! 
>>>>

So we've been remodeling our kitchen and it's been really stressful. We have to do so much and have EVERYTHING ready in 5 days.  That's why I haven't posted very much. 


Dealing with disappointment-
I've been feeling like I'm about to cry a lot. I found out that I wouldn't be able to meet someone when we go up to NE, and it has just been really hard. I wonder if they just don't trust me, or what? What is the point of being best friends if we can't even meet each other??
Idk, Maybe my expectations were too high, but this is what I know. That if my internet best friend was coming up right past where we live, then I would make every effort to meet this wonderful person. My parents I know would understand and without a doubt let us meet each other! We both have blogs and know a bunch about each other, and that we both without a doubt love the Lord with all our hearts.
I don't know why the Lord did this. I really don't want to offend any of you, I just can't keep going with these thoughts that I feel like I should tell you. I'm trying to just be honest and say what I feel.  
I'm trying really hard to just accept it, if this is the Lord's will. 


I did not expect this,
I hoped for something else.
Now I'm left without peace.
Let me know, Lord
that all understanding
and wisdom, 
are found in your wounds.
Show me that I,
 must trust
in You alone

                                                                                         Ever been to the ER?
                                                    Share your thoughts with me!!!
(p.s. Please don't be offended by anything  I said. I was simply sharing my feelings and don't want to hurt anyone. )
                                                     Love y'all!!! <33333